in a Noisy World
If you’ve ever watched your child scroll through their phone for an hour and then struggle to hold a five-minute conversation, you’re not alone. If you’ve ever wondered whether the world your kids are growing up in is making it harder to raise them with the values you believe in, you’re not alone. Something has shifted. And most parents feel it.
The noise isn’t just loud. It’s relentless. Social media’s constant comparison has dramatically altered the state of children like never before. Worst of all, social media never sleeps.
Throughout history there’s always been that fear of addiction to new information. First it was newspapers, radio, magazines, television, and video games. All these innovations were designed to get people to consume, to purchase, and to subscribe. But none of them actually had the ability to learn on the go like social media. The reality? The machine knows who your children are better than you do.
The data on this is sobering. Kids between the ages of 8 and 18 now spend an average of seven hours per day in front of a screen and that does not include screen time for schoolwork. Seven hours!! That’s more time than most kids spend sleeping, eating, or talking to the people they live with.
Pause a moment and take a deep breath. It’s okay. We are in this together.
Here’s something that often gets overlooked in the conversation about raising resilient kids; faith works. Faith is a source of identity that doesn’t shift with every influencers’ opinion or social media trend. The Bible is always the Bible and the stories don’t change. And the lessons evolve with us.
Research consistently shows that kids who have a strong faith foundation, who know they are loved unconditionally, who have a community that holds them accountable, and who enjoy a framework for making sense of suffering and uncertainty, will fare better across almost every measure of wellbeing. They show lower rates of anxiety and depression. They’re more likely to bounce back from setbacks. They’re more connected to their communities and more likely to serve others.
What faith offers that a screen simply cannot is this, an unchanging truth in a world of shifting opinions. A child who knows they are created by God, loved by God, and called by God has an answer to the question every teenager is secretly asking: Am I enough? Do I matter? Does any of this mean anything?
We’ve created this list as a starting point to help you keep your children safe when it comes to social media and screen time. Please know this is a fluid list and it’s going to take effort and there will be times when you find yourself taking a break. But always come back to these guidelines. We promise they will make a difference.
10 Guidelines for Parents
Taking Back Control from the Algorithm
MOST IMPORTANT: Faith Matters — Today, Tomorrow, and Forever
We live in a world full of media ready to grow our faith too. It starts with church. Your church is a wonderful place for children to get involved, whether helping with children’s ministry, volunteering with technology, or starting their own Bible study or prayer group. For your teen, faith can be the only stable foundation they have when times get rough. God’s love and the stories found in the Bible are just as inspirational in this digital world as they’ve ever been.
How Churches & Parents Can Help Teens with Mental Health →Create a Plan
Just like a visual exercise plan helps us stick to training, a family media plan can do the same for your family. Don’t start from scratch, use online resources to jumpstart your plan.
Family Media Plan Tool — HealthyChildren.org →Create Device-Free Zones and Times
Set up times where technology is off limits and focus on specific areas of the house such as your child’s bedroom. Create an overnight charging station and make sure devices actually end up there at the end of the night. Give time updates before shutting things down. These check-ins are far more valuable than one abrupt “time’s up” at the end of the day.
Your Digital Detox Zone — Verizon.com →Be Open with Conversations and Repeat Them
There are a lot of uncomfortable things happening on social media, so it’s important to talk about them early and often. If you’re not sure what to watch for, start here. And always stay calm during conversations. If your child senses they’re in trouble, you risk cutting off communication and pushing them to find answers elsewhere.
Teen Online Safety Resources — The Mental Health Coalition →Be Their Safe Space
This is a repeat of #3 and it’s worth repeating because it’s that important. Through constant and calm conversations you build a relationship of trust. You don’t have to have all the answers, but let your child know you are there to protect them. They will make mistakes. Always reassure them that no mistake is ever a dead end.
How to Fix Social Media Mishaps — Smart Social →Be the Example
We get it. At the end of the day there’s nothing better than mindless scrolling to help unwind. However, the negative impacts of social media on mental health don’t stop at age 20. If you are distracted by your smartphone, children will learn how to replace you. As AI becomes more prevalent, so does the threat of artificial friendships. It’s not easy but put the phone out of sight, and soon you’ll start to free yourself to be truly present for your kids.
Check the Settings
It’s easy to think “my kid won’t do that” but the online world is full of temptations, and children are up against professionals whose job it is to convince them to do something they shouldn’t. Check your child’s device often and look for device settings to help keep them safe. If navigating the world of security features feels overwhelming, a service like Kidslox can help.
Parental Controls Made Simple — Kidslox →Chromebooks Are Sneaky
Chromebooks are synonymous with education these days and can easily be overlooked as a social media tool. Most platforms including Snapchat, Instagram, and TikTok can be accessed through a Chromebook. If your child has a school-issued Chromebook, check whether social media sites are filtered on your home network as well as at school. Don’t assume the filter travels with the device. Homework on a Chromebook shouldn’t be done behind closed doors.
Pay Attention to Your Child’s Mood
If your child seems down and isn’t as excited about the things they’ve always enjoyed, pay attention. Yes, the teenage years can be tough on emotions, but cyberbullying is an ongoing threat. It can arise from school relationships or complete strangers. There are people in this world paid to bully your children into doing something they don’t want to do. Stay engaged and go back to steps 3 and 4.
Consider Alternatives to Smartphones
If you’re worried about keeping track of younger kids, there are alternatives worth considering. An Apple Watch with cellular capabilities allows phone calls and texting, location tracking via Find My, and gives you far more control over what apps are added. There’s no camera and it’s a lot cooler than a Gizmo for the pre-teen crowd.
The World Is Noisy. Your Home Doesn’t Have to Be.
You don’t have to be a perfect parent to raise a grounded kid. You just have to be a present one willing to engage, willing to talk, and willing to point them toward something bigger than the next notification.
The good news is you don’t have to do it alone. Schools, churches, communities, and friends who share your values are all part of the equation. When the environment around your child reinforces what you’re teaching at home and when faith isn’t just a Sunday thing but an everyday thing, grounded kids are a lot more likely to stay that way.
That’s worth fighting for. And it’s worth building on purpose.
Looking for a Community
That Shares Your Values?
At Trinity Lutheran School and Grand Island Lutheran High, faith is a pillar of our identity. It’s lived every single day whether in the classroom, on the field, on the court, on the stage and in the hallways. We’d love to show you what that looks like.